Relationshipy-ship: Golden Rule No.1

The book I'm reading prior to "the bells" is very helpful to not only those who are going to tie the knot, but to anyone who is in a relationship because this book talks about building the basic foundations of a successful relationship.



I'm sure that if you put these Golden Rules into practice ( It really helps! ), you will reap the benefits of a beautiful lasting relationship with your darling/honey/sweetheart/buttercup/cutesy-pie/smoochie-bug/Tigger/Munchkin/poopy/Fuzzy-wuzzy...ok ok ya you get what I mean.

SO here's a summary of

GOLDEN RULE NO.1:
Make time for each other and HAVE FUN together!

To grow closer as a couple, both must be PROACTIVE in the relationship, not REACTIVE. Relationships thrives on creativity and initiatives not the constant blast of expectations and accusations of "why can't you be more this and that...".




Thus, we need to take the initiative to make time for the things that we believe are important- and we need to make them NOW!

To deprive a relationship of time spent together is like depriving each other of air, or a plant of water.



Time together with the people who matter most does not JUST HAPPEN- it requires a deliberate and determined decision.

Time together is SIMPLE but POWERFUL!

Plan it!



Prioritize it!



Protect it!



Keeping time for each other is not easy and it is the 1st thing that can slip quietly out of a loving relationship.

2 weeks WITHOUT the opportunity to relax, have fun and communicate together properly is a LLLOOOONNNGGGGGG time in marriage/relationship. When we have had time together, we experience a sense of well-being.



BUT it doesn't mean we shouldn't have time apart although a priority must be given to find activities that both enjoy.

Somethings we feel differently about and some interests we will be unable to share together. (work/social events/church activities/ personality/abilities/level of self-confidence)



" Many couples have trouble with this aspect. They feel abandoned when their partner wants time apart (going out with his peers, football, watch football etc etc etc). In reality, we all need time apart, which makes us realize the need to be back together again. People in healthy relationships cherish each other's space and are champions of each other's causes. If both attitude's are right, pursuing interest separately can be good but some interest needs to be stopped if it puts a strain on the relationship."

The process of blending 2 lives into 1 can only happen as we develop a regular pattern of disclosing to one another our separate worlds.



IN A NUT SHELL:

At the heart of a strong relationship is a strong friendship. Even good friendships drift apart unless it is positively fed and held together. Regular time together is the 1st investment needed to keep the friendship growing and to provide a firm foundation for a strong relationship;
it is a means of staying closely connected and to keep the romance alive.




NEXT GOLDEN RULE: COMMUNICATING

Weather Weeeee!

So DUMDUMDUM the day has arrived.

Made our way to the studio to get makeup and hair done before heading out to PD.



Man, back ache la sitting on the chair for like about an hour an a half!

And you know what Jason was doing? SLEEPING! Sleeping on the nice sofa.

The makeup-artist:"Other people's husband don't sleep, your husband sleep here. HAHA!"

Giggle. Giggle. Giggle.

It's so unfair that he only takes like 10 minutes to put his makeup and hair!

The makeup-artist:" Wah Jason..your face so nice and so fair...like...! "

Giggle.Giggle.Giggle.

The makeup-artist:"One eat cannot get fat; one fair cannot get dark. LOL!"

Giggle.Giggle.Giggle.

Throughout the day it was windy with alternating rain and shine.



So it sounded something like this:

Faster! Sunny!
*Snap
*Snap
*Snap
Oh no! raining! To the car!
*Run
*Run
*Run
After 5 mintues: Ok back to work!
*Snap
*Snap
*Snap
Raining again! RUN!
*Run
*Run
*Run
After 10 minutes: Ok Let's go!
* Snap & BURN!
* Snap & BURN!
* Snap & BURN!
SO HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok last place: Faster, rain coming already!
*Snap
*Snap
*Snap
RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!



Yea the moment we finish our LAST shot, the rain poured.
Literally.
I'm not kidding.
IT was THAT drastic, THAT nyam, THAT crazy!
And it was no normal rain, it was thunder and lighting heavy rain.
JUST in the nick of time.
WE could SEE the rain coming towards us, like a blanket of rain towering over us.
PHEW.We made it to the car DRY!
The moment we closed our car door-
SPLAT SPLAT SPLAT
Big droplets of rain came pouring down!
WE couldn't even see the road in front of us!
THAT HEAVY!

The couple who came later than us didn't get to take there, maybe just like 2 shots before they had to run for their lives.

EmHum!
God takes care of us, but He is careful not to spoil us. :P

Yea, of course, we prayed:
Oh god let it bit windy, and cloudy and not sunny and no rain and lovely weather and not hot but yet not rainy but yet got sun but yet may the sun not be to hot...thinking that God will do miracles again, especially the way we want it to be- pampered-ly perfect! HAHA.

But God is gracious and funny.
He was probably saying: OHHHH dare to ask so much la..i give la you wait.

Rain.


Shine.


Rain AND shine.


SUPER HOT!


THUNDERSTORM!


But throughout the weather was still nice to take pics- at least he gave us wind! :P

And He held the STORM for us until the last second.
Till we finished the LAST shot.
After that, He literally let go of His water-filled hands.

And He kept us safe and well.
We didn't feel THAT tired,
wasn't THAT thirsty,
wasn't THAT hungry.

REMEMBER, He is wise in His givings as well.
He knows how to differentiate what you WANT
and what you really NEED.

So be careful what you pray for! :P

He has ears,

and humour.

P.s I'm burnt!

Did You Know?

Did you know:

Jason and I sat next to each other after baptism for phototaking, but, heck, we didn't know we even existed yet.




Did you know:

Jason and I has NEVER had a phone conversation before.

Perfect!

Reason: WE both don't really like talking on the phone. Much prefers face to face conversations.




Did you know:

I use to call the wrong Jason. I wanted to call my friend Jason but always ended up calling up my future-boyfriend Jason ( That time still don't really know him but got his number because I had to play for him for worship.)

Ring*Ring

Jason's inner-voice: Ruth is calling me? Ouuuu.Why? I wonder... :) Heart beating faster.

Jason: Hello?
Ruth : Wei, Hello Jason ah?
Jason: Yea?
Ruth: Hmmm wait. Opps. Sorry I think I called the wrong Jason. HeHE.Sorrryyyyyyy. Bye.

*Hang-up

Jason's inner voice: Darn.

LOL. Like more than once it happened. At least twice.




Did you know:

Jason called me Ruth TIONG at a wedding dinner! Hmph! :P

Ursher: What's your partner's name?
Jason: Ruth.
Ursher: Ruth what?
Jason:Errrr..Ruth...Tiong.
Ruth: ( give him the stare...) RUTH TIONGGGGGG????
Jason: Opps I mean ahh Ruth Lee. Lee. ( Giving the tongue out expression)
Ruth: Die. You DIIIEEEEEEE.

Doesn't know his own gf's sir-name. Tsk tsk.


Did you know:

WE had an unforgettable Jinx moment.
It was one of those first few dates when you were dining in Italianies and suddenly both of us said:

" Ouuu! I love this song!"

AT THE EXACT SAME TIME!

You should have look at Jason's face man. He was so shocked, he couldn't say anything for a few minutes.

Reason: What are the chances of someone liking the same song ( especially when it is a very very old song and not very popular), hearing the song and blurting out the exact same words at the exact same time of the song.

So, since then it was "our" song.



Ok, can't think of anything else at the moment.

God chose my dress! :)

I'm so excited to tell you guys this! Guess what? I found the perfect dress!!!!!!!!
And it's so amazing, it's God's timing and His leading indeed. DIVINE INTERVENTION i tell you.

So we were suppose to go look and try for MORE wedding dresses on Sat,and was foreseeing another tiring unfulfilling cannot find a dress day. All these wedding shops only cater to one style. And to add to that, we had to settle printing the cards ASAP. So we decided to look around here before heading to Pudu area where his friends mention that many shops print wedding cards for like RM1.50 per piece. So looked at the shop around here, and the shop that said they printed wedding cards...DIDN'T print wedding cards. Got bluffed. haha. And so just before we left we notice another printing shop next to it but it didn't have any indication that it prints wedding cards. I guess we decided to ask anyway, no harm trying right? So we went in and guess what? We got it printed for like 90cent per piece. HEH. :) One problem solved (and at a good price), one more to go- THE DRESS.

We headed for lunch first but was feeling really tired and lazy and dreading to go labour looking for dresses. while eating I was thinking :" I don't want to go, I don't' want to go, I don't' want to go...maybe I should just go back to the previous shop and get the second choice which was not what I wanted but I guess the best so far. :( " I gave Jason the look, and he said :" Why? What's with the PMS look?" I told him my woes and he said he didn't really want to go either but wouldn't want to go the next day so he suggested to just drag ourselves there ( to a shop that his friend suggested ) and have a look and head back quickly. Doubt it would be any different from the previous ones.SIGH. OKLOH.

So we dragged ourselves there.Pressed the door bell to a small shop on the second floor. The lady opened it. And everything just fell into place.We said we were looking this certain style. And guess what, the absolutely loves the style we were looking for and can't believes why everyone wants tube type. She even had a collection and she custom makes too. She said she can make mine and rent it out since my size is quite rent-a-ble. But it would be worth me keeping it cause the cost is not much different.And the price to MAKE and KEEP the dress it is not much different from renting a gown from the other shops...so it is absolutely worth it. So she designed like a lovely one for me! :) And everything that i wanted! :) :) :)
Might as well do an evening dress as well said Jason, what more, if I own it, I can use it twice- for the kl and Ipoh one. Beats renting the gown twice for almost the same price. And it's lovely!!!! :) :) :) SO 1 hour gaotim, designed, ready to make, solved!

WE were in awe and smiling ear to ear at each other and at God when we left the shop cause we couldn't believe how everything fell into place in such perfect timing- when we were about to give up. God is funny once again. He always waits for us to almost give up, surrender fully to Him, and then He leads in such perfection!

WE were also in awe and laughing out loud when we left the shop cause we left the shop WITHOUT my shoes. I forgot that I left my shoes in the changing room. HAHA. Too excited la tu. That was funny. I walked out and wondered..hey where's my shoes. :P

I'm so tempted to let you see pictures of how it would look like. But no fun la tu. I'll keep it a surprise! :)

So, No more wedding nightmares for me! :) HEHE.Back to my normal dreams. PHEW!

God really does take care of our every need! No matter is too small for Him! And He proves it over and over again. This wedding journey in all its ups and down boils down to one thing-experiencing Him ever more of His faithfulness and goodness and how we need to trust in Him in all things- ALL things.

I am reminded of this song:

1. 'Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to take Him at His word;
Just to rest upon His promise;
Just to know, Thus saith the Lord.

* Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him,
How I've proved Him o'er and o'er,
Jesus, Jesus, Precious Jesus!
O for grace to trust Him more.

2. O how sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to trust His cleansing blood;
Just in simple faith to plunge me,
'Neath the healing, cleansing flood.

3. Yes, 'tis sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just from sin and self to cease;
Just from Jesus simply taking
Life, and rest, and joy, and peace.

4. I'm so glad I learned to trust Thee,
Precious Jesus, Savior, Friend;
And I know that Thou art with me,
Wilt be with me to the end.

Readddyyyy..on your mark!

Time flies doesn't it. A few more months and I'll be Mrs Kuok. Sometimes thinking about it does freak me out a little. The changes that are coming-can be overwhelming sometimes.Suddenly have to jaga hubby, jaga house, jaga cooking and jaga kiddos next time.

And it doesn't help when people come up to me and say :" Why you want to marry so fast and so young?" And they give me the look like it's a bad, terrible thing to do. Hmmmm. I guess it depends what kind of values one holds. Most people will think it is better to get those Cs first...career, car, condo etc etc etc That is their definition of being "ready" to get married...finish seeing the world. One fella even told my dad that he is making a mistake marrying me off so early. Said why don't want to play around first, try other people first. You know what my dad replied? He said:"By the time you finish playing around with other people and you realize that the one you really love was the first one, well, it would be too late." Good reply dad. HAHA.

Of course it is different cause Jason is 6 years older. Then people go... OHHHHH ok la like that. No wonder. Hmmmm. Another one said that why you don't paktoh longer? 3 years only what.

When Jason and I first started dating, we already told each other that we won't date more than 3 years. 3 years is like the limit.And I'm glad the 3 years is up. We started dating each other with the intention to marry, and I'm glad things work out and yay we are finally getting married.

Look last time we look so young:




God is really a perfect match maker.Sometimes, most times in fact, we tell ourselves and tell God that we want this and that and this and that, want him to be tall la handsome la musically incline la romantic la thoughtful la active la understanding la blah blah blah... in our future spouse but we fail to let God decide what is really good for us. It is only when you let go and let God, that is when He will really surprise you. He knows what you need and MORE! And you realize that God has given you all that you need and even more than you asked, hoped and wanted.At least that was how it was for Jason and I and thus we really do thank God for each other. Cause to tell you the truth, we started going out as strangers. So it is really was by divine intervention that we discovered each other and how good God is to have given us what we need (and what we didn't know we need) in each other.To tell you the truth again, we have no idea why we started going out with each other as well...dunno what happen but it happened. Divine intervention I tell you.heh.

So I'm I ready? Yes I am. Ready to get on this roller coaster and ride it out with the person I love through all the ups and down. Yup. Ready to love, to continue loving, to forgive, to encourage, to accept each other's differences and appreciate em. Ready to serve one another and together.Ready to get angry at each other and overcome it. Yes, definately. Nobody said it is going to be easy or smooth. But I'm readying myself to be ready to face the challenges. And i quote someone who got married:" Oh yes it is challenging, but it is worth it! :) " Most importantly, ready to let God lead each step each day.

Let the busyness BEGIN!

ok...

now it is starting to get intense.wedding preparations I mean. We are definitely look shaking our legs anymore la HAHA. Ahyo..looking for gown and trying gowns also so tiring already. Phew. After that brain dead for the whole day. HMMM.

And we are starting to get nightmares! Wedding nightmares! Dang.

Bird Brain

I was in my living room looking out at the balcony when I saw thousands and thousands of birds in the sky. The white birds were holding one end of lots of strings while the black community of birds was holding the other ends. Both sides were working together to tie a single black bird (this bird must be of great importance) in the middle. I thought to myself: “Man, these birds are smart! What are they doing and how do they know how to capture another bird with that technique? It’s like they are civilized.”

So I took a picture with my phone secretly. However, at the corner of their eyes they saw me. I pretended not to look at placed my phone on the floor so it would not be visible. I was afraid of them as I didn’t know if they were good or bad. All I knew was that they can be dangerous so I shouldn’t mess with them.

Suddenly I received a few MMS on my hand phone. I peered over and saw pictures of the birds eating up the bird in the middle. Gross! I was shocked and I knew that the birds sent the pictures to me for a reason. Some birds came into my house I was began to get weary and scared. They communicated to me thought telepathy and they were interrogating me. And they told me that birds have hand phones too. It is their custom that 3 birds will share one hand phone. They usually hold the phones by their beaks in unison, carefully balancing the phone in the middle.

These birds were actually quite intelligent. Over the centuries, they have formed they own civilization and they even have their own ruling system; a hierarchy of some sort. And the bird that they captured earlier was the evil bird king.

After that incident, strange things began to happen in the land right outside my balcony, I heard loud screeches from the birds and when I walked to my balcony to see what was going on: I could see wild animals everywhere! On the left, a coconut tree had four Sarawak Birds on it. Nearby, a big black wolf with a broken leg limped past. I could see cute baby wolves trying to catch up with the big black wolf that was far ahead of them. To the North, in a distance, a black jaguar strolled past the land. A white polar bear with its young occupied the space on the right, after the gate that leads into a fruit plantation.


P.s Pictures will come later. I can't find my camera!

ZITS...FUNNY!

Cute Kiddo giving a speech!

Hey check this out! So cute!!!!! 4 Years old only, can give motivational speech. Haha.